Delete, type, delete, repeat.
That sums up the past month of daily blogging.
When I started this challenge, I assumed that I would find a cozy coffee shop and type away. How inspiration, genius, creativity, and insight would flow out of me. This has never been the case, so why I thought it would be now, I am not sure. I lie to myself occasionally.
This month has taught me that sometimes you have to just do it. Sit down, open your computer and type. What follows is a lot of crap. Posts that you cringe at, days that you can only force out a quick poem, and many deleted pages. Occasionally, there are these perfectly profound nuggets of awesomeness. They stick out from the rest and you realize, the past five hundred words, have been leading you to this.
When you write every day, it’s apparent that you and your mind don’t always work in collaboration. I usually spend fifteen minutes squirming in my chair, allowing distractions to take my mind away until I am able to get my fingers moving.
Thirty days ago, I saw a different outcome. I would write about becoming a better blogger and how the month was full of fantastic articles, insight and growth. This is not that post. However, the habit of this daily routine has changed me. I look forward to the strange discomfort surrounding the task. How I have time to dive into my brain and see what comes out of it. The good, the bad, and the even worse.
This is why I write.
To overcome that internal force that drives me away from doing what I need to. To face it every day and know I will again tomorrow. I don’t do it to become a better writer, although that is a plus. I do it to recognize my internal struggle and hit submit anyway.